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	Rice Krispies "Make You Strong" (27 June 2004)
	by Dr Tricky   Mr Strong: strength from eggs Rice Krispies are the secret to super-human strength - at least according to Mr Stanley Archibald, of Esh Winning, Co. Durham. We visited Mr Archibald at his home, and it is undeniable that he is very strong. Very strong indeed. "Yeah" he said in an interview "I eat Rice Krispies every day for breakfast. And I'm very strong". And then, as if just to prove the point, he lifted a housebrick with his left eyelid. Eggs Of course, links between nutrition and strength are not a new idea to the scientific community. In fact, Mr Strong himself (the strongest man who has ever lived, and who ever will live) claimed that his strength was the result of eating eggs fro breakfast, eggs for lunch, eggs for dinner and eggs for supper. Yes, that's right - eggs! Rice Pops: only Kellogg's in a different box   Not Understood But the supposed strength-giving qualities of crisped rice breakfast cereal are not yet fully understood. "We don't yet fully understand the supposed strength-giving qualities of crisped rice breakfast cereal" said a leading scientist. "But it might just turn out to be psychosomatic." Which all sounds terribly complicated. Matrix Inversion We asked Mr Archibald if he had any ideas as to what causes the apparently magical strength giving qualities. "It's all down to matrix inversion of the underlying space-time symmetries" he said, ripping a telephone directory apart with his ears. The actual cause for Mr Archibald's strength may never be known. But one thing is absolutely certain - he makes me shit my pants. And in related news: My Dad sent these Shredded Wheat back to the manufacturers, because they were faulty. Not even a black hole can eat three shredded wheat? Not even a Shredded Wheat factory can make three Shredded Wheat properly, it would appear! Either that, or a rogue black hole sneaked inside the box during the packing process, and had a bit of a sneaky nibble...