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THE
CORE
5/10
USA 2003
: Jon AMIEL : 103 mins (approx)
Though its
premise seems to be Armageddon in reverse – the planet’s would-be
saviours must burrow right into the Earth to prevent apocalypse
– The Core harks back to a much earlier end-of-the-world disaster-thon:
1961’s The Day the Earth Caught Fire. Because rather than freakish
galactic bad luck, the blame for our perils lies squarely at the feet
of mankind itself, or at least those hawkish factions who used to be called
the ‘Military-Industrial Complex.’ Fearing that America’s (unspecified)
“enemies” are developing some kind of mega-weapon designed to trigger
cataclysmic earthquakes on US territory, Uncle Sam’s boffins come up with
an identical device – in accordance with the old Reaganite principle of
‘Mutually Assured Destruction.’
Nobody seems
sure whether this key McGuffin project is spelled ‘Destiny’ or ‘Destini,’
but needless to say, testing the seismic uber-whatsit has unfortunate
repercussions. The molten iron glop around the Earth’s core stops revolving,
threatening the planet’s protective electromagnetic shield: ensuing photogenic
mishaps range from pigeons going crazy in Trafalgar Square to the burning
of Rome and the melting of (one-time supposed Al-Qaeda target) Golden
Gate Bridge in what is pointedly described as “the most devastasting and
baffling event in our nation’s history.” The only solution is to detonate
nuclear devices around the core itself – “weapons of mass destruction
will save the planet!”. But getting down there poses some
apparently insurmountable problems…
At this point
The Core turns into Fantastic Voyage (1966), with a plucky
crew hurtling through the Earth’s mantle of glowing golden glop in ‘Virgil’,
a near-indestructible vessel that looks and acts like a giant drill-bit.
On board: youthful astronaut and ace navigator Childs (Hilary Swank),
her commanding-officer Iverson (Bruce Greenwood), feuding academics Keyes
(Aaron Eckhart) and Zimsky (Stanley Tucci), token foreigner Sergei (Tcheky
Karyo) and the ship’s inventor Brazleton (Delroy Lindo) – while in Houson
NASA project-supervisor Stick (Alfre Woodard) gnaws her manicured nails.
“What if the
core was made of cheese?” the imperious Zimsky sarcastically asks at one
point when his expertise is questioned – but as for the movie, there’s
no ‘what if’ about it. This is 100 percent sci-fi gorgonzola from start
to finish - then again, there’s nothing wrong with a little fromage
every now and again, especially if it’s served in such an undemanding
and digestible form. Just as Childs narrowly negotiates the Virgil through
all manner of obstacles, Amiel likewise skilfully steers The Core
down a tricky middle course between the ever-looming twin hazards of camp
(Evolution) and pomp
(Armageddon, Deep Impact).
The slumming
cast keep commendably deadpan faces as they deliver the slabs of jargon-loaded
exposition that pad out Cooper Layne and John Rogers’ script - each major
plot-point of which is even more ludicrous than the last. We’re told that
Virgil is made of a miracle substance informally known as ‘Unobtainium’,
though ‘Unbelievium’ would be much closer to the mark - while entertaining
enough, the shameless and relentlessly escalating absurdities prevent
any proper build-up of tension, as does the script’s slavish adherence
to established genre rules. The characters are picked off one-by-one in
strict billing order, while the fact that we’re always aware the real
problem is going to be getting the Virgil out of the core rather
than in removes any doubt about the success of the mission itself.
But even at
a patience-stretching 103 minutes, The Core is never boring – if
nothing else, it’s always good to see the finger of blame pointed
so squarely at the US military and their co-opted scientists, with a distinctly
seventies eco-vibe detectable throughout. “We killed the planet!”
someone yelps, while a school of friendly whales crops up at a couple
of crucial junctures, setting up a final scene in which Eckhart’s
idealistic Keyes (despite his muscles, a long way removed from Bruce Willis’s
mercenary Armageddon drillers) explicitly rejects the temptation of a
well-paid NASA job in order to stay with his (inattentive) students. Today’s
lesson: the victory of ‘pure’ academia over the bastardised,
corrupted form represented by the egomaniacal Zimsky.
Because, despite
the ‘surface’ chaos of its cobbled-together plot, The Core’s ideological
subtext holds together surprisingly well - which is partly why it’s preferable
to Eckhart’s last turn as an unkempt prof, the relatively po-faced Possession.
The gleefully implausible Core has none of that movie’s highbrow
pretensions – despite all the scientific gobbledygook, the film adheres
to the long-standing principle that films about hyper-intelligent people
are invariably extremely dumb themselves. Here, that means endless on-screen
captions telling us exactly what’s going on, and when, and where – though
there’s never any real doubt that we’re always slap bang in a lump of
prime, camembert-flavoured ‘unbelievium’.
24th
March, 2003
(seen 24th March, Odeon Gate, Newcastle)
by Neil
Young
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